Still, all is moving.
Mar. 1st, 2026 10:14 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
smokingbootThis contradiction pleases me.
My efforts are still slow and foggy and I have missed a deadline. But I can't be blamed for that, what I do is what I can do. It's not up to par by a long way but there is definitely improvement.
I got good news this week, but won't go into that. I also got disappointing news but I won't go into that either. The good outweighed the bad.
Meanwhile there was great socialising and far too much food alongside strange dreams. One was on Wednesday night, very short but vivid, a bubble of blood spilling out of a mouth. I didn't know if it was mine, but when the bubble popped in a non-messy non-splatty way, I could speak. It was better. Better than what ? I don't know.
Then last night I had a dream that may have been born of ridiculous amounts of food, but was so pleasant I decided to record it anyway. I was in a house with two toilets. I went to the outside privy only to find it had been completely overtaken by flowers, they were blossoming in the pan and all over it. I told myself I would pull them out and clean the whole thing up when they had finished blooming, then I went away and left it to grow.
On returning to a house I saw something like a glass screen, and behind it was underwater at first. I saw tadpoles, really big long tailed ones and then frogs with extremely long spindly limbs. Then I saw that the back lifted onto a tree root supported riverbank, and between the holes I could see foxes and weasels and many more little mammals watching from behind them.
I didn't realise til I woke that today is the first day of Spring, but clearly my subconscious knows more than I do. And though every thing is just that little bit harder than it was - even writing this post feels like effort - still, all is moving.
My efforts are still slow and foggy and I have missed a deadline. But I can't be blamed for that, what I do is what I can do. It's not up to par by a long way but there is definitely improvement.
I got good news this week, but won't go into that. I also got disappointing news but I won't go into that either. The good outweighed the bad.
Meanwhile there was great socialising and far too much food alongside strange dreams. One was on Wednesday night, very short but vivid, a bubble of blood spilling out of a mouth. I didn't know if it was mine, but when the bubble popped in a non-messy non-splatty way, I could speak. It was better. Better than what ? I don't know.
Then last night I had a dream that may have been born of ridiculous amounts of food, but was so pleasant I decided to record it anyway. I was in a house with two toilets. I went to the outside privy only to find it had been completely overtaken by flowers, they were blossoming in the pan and all over it. I told myself I would pull them out and clean the whole thing up when they had finished blooming, then I went away and left it to grow.
On returning to a house I saw something like a glass screen, and behind it was underwater at first. I saw tadpoles, really big long tailed ones and then frogs with extremely long spindly limbs. Then I saw that the back lifted onto a tree root supported riverbank, and between the holes I could see foxes and weasels and many more little mammals watching from behind them.
I didn't realise til I woke that today is the first day of Spring, but clearly my subconscious knows more than I do. And though every thing is just that little bit harder than it was - even writing this post feels like effort - still, all is moving.
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