Lurgiana

It's getting better slowly, but I am in a right state. Had to go and get money for the cleaner, barely any distance to travel, it left me dizzy and breathless, coughing and wheezing like a pneumoniac and all I want to do is go to bed. The cleaner is here now; I feel guilty about the poor lady having to put up with my germy atmosphere, but I put her off last week, and can't do the same now. I remember years when no work meant no money at all, and can't imagine the agency pays those whose customers cry off.

Asylum seekers, refugees, immigrants...Merkel says that the outbreaks of xenophobia in Germany are few compared to the readiness of the country to accept 800,000 asylum seekers. 'Germany is strong,' she says. 10,000 Icelanders are ready to help, it seems. And Britain? Well we are desperate, we can't, we just can't, the infrastructure is falling apart and the impact is so huge and we owe billions and we just dont have the money we just don't have the money...we have to deny sick and starving born here, so we just can't help anyone else, we don't have enough. We have to deny people a few hundred a month, we have enough for a cut in inheritance tax of course, but what's that got to do with anything? 12 billion cut out of the Welfare budget, but if your house is worth a million, you can pass it on to your kids tax-free. That's how desperate we really are.

We are so caught up in wealth worship it is disgusting.
Having said that, this isn't everything we are. Across Europe and here too, people want to help.I find it heartening.

Might be talking to Elvis Diary about going down to Calais with some stuff, though I don't think her purple E-type's the most appropriate convoy wagon. But first, I had better get well. It's been over a week now, and I'm still a wreck. Editing's been put on hold, I was hoping to start again today. Impossible.

Dreams ah dreams

Dreams of that flu-riddled high temperature medicinal type; meeting friends from the studio discussing what had become of them. One was having problems in filming. We discussed nonsense, I went out and found myself with my old deceased chum Olivia



and a young man whom, it transpires, looks very like her brother who died before I got to know her. They were young adults, dressed in 30s style clothing, very happy and giddy...and I had forgotten until now that there was a lovely old vintage car present. We talked and I had to go, wandering through streets full of fortune tellers and tarot readers. She said to her companion, 'She's going to leave now, you must catch her!' And to my surprise he did catch up with me. I was considering tripping his feet up in my long scarf as the dream faded away...