Kafka's Soup

[smokingboot]

I've had some wonderful presents this Christmas, but only one could induce me to torture friends with my cooking. 'Kafka's soup; a complete history of world literature in 14 recipes' was bought for me by november_girl and it is just wonderful.

There's tarragon eggs a la Jane Austen; "It is a truth universally acknowledged that eggs, kept for too long, go off..." but not in this case, for once our heroine has used fresh eggs and followed the recipe, "She could barely hold back her raptures at how good the eggs and tarragon looked together and anticipated the happy moment when she would see them united on toast."

Or boned stuffed poussins a la Marquis de Sade: "Outside, the judge was slowly peeling away the wrapping to reveal two fleshy white birds, breasts uppermost. I saw his eyes widen and he began talking to the two poussins. 'What have we here? Two naughty little birds.' As he spoke, he gave one of them a playful slap. 'We will need to teach you a lesson.' Placing a hand on each bird he gave them a squeeze. 'You have nothing to fear, my little chicks; it is I whom am corrupted. Whilst I will break my vow before heaven and must expect the harshest punishment, your innocent souls perch in paradise...'

But the recipe that is calling me has got to be Rich Chocolate Cake a la Irvine Welsh:
" Ah drop a packet of butter intae the pan and light the flame beneath it. As it melts, ah pour on the sugar, watching the white grains dissolved into the golden brown liquid. They're dissolving cleanly; it's good fuckin shite. ma hands are shaking as ah sprinkle the brown powder of the cocoa intae the pan and when ah drop in the bar of chocolate ah have the satisfaction of watching it melt straight away. This is a quality fuckin cook-up."

Unlike Irvine ('Ah dinnae want to share any of this shite with mah so-called friends') I would like to share it, so if I ever make a chocolate cake, feel free to come round and have some. But remember, you have to read the book to me. And do all the accents too.

P.S. Yes, I'm still hungry.

Comments

[colonel-maxim.livejournal.com]

I thought that you liked us, what have we done to you to make you threaten us with your cooking? :-)

Play rough with me would you?

[smokingboot.livejournal.com]

Right. It's Cheese on Toast a la Harold Pinter for you.

Apropos of nothing, my dear, I notice that you and caddyman have both got sinister black and white icons..and are those the same shades you're each wearing? Admit it!

Cripes chaps, we've been rumbled.

[colonel-maxim.livejournal.com]

It's a fair cop, you got us bang to rights but I ain't grassing until my brief gets here.
It seems that photos taken with a camera phone just look better in black and white.

Re: Cripes chaps, we've been rumbled.

[smokingboot.livejournal.com]

The one you've just used as an icon is fabulous!

I don't doubt the sinister allure of those shades, I just feel the junta should be able to supply you with a pair each.

Let no-one say that I am shallow

[colonel-maxim.livejournal.com]

Or desperately seeking approval but I have promptly changed my default icon. Such power you have :-)

Because contrasts are my thing

[smokingboot.livejournal.com]

The genial/sinister mirrorshades face on is very cool. I like your original icon arrangment. Don't abandon it!

[rebby.livejournal.com]

Sounds lovely. How far away from me are you exactly?
I so believe I have a bar of Maya gold somewhere.......

[smokingboot.livejournal.com]

ooooooh. Sounds good. Chocolate cake, or cut to the chase and go for total fondue immersion?

[rebby.livejournal.com]

TOTAL fondue immersion. Now that is something that has to be seen to be believed

[smokingboot.livejournal.com]

Doesn't bear too much thinking about. Would chocolate taste as good with someone siting in it?

Depends on the person I guess...

[rebby.livejournal.com]

You'd have to mix something with the chocolate, to make sure it doesn't go hard.
Hmm now what type of alcohol should we choose?

[smokingboot.livejournal.com]

Hmm...let me see...orange or hazelnut are renowned for their affinity for chocolate...but where on earth are we going to find alcohol flavoured like that?;-)

It's a dreadful job but someone has to do it

[rebby.livejournal.com]

It maybe hard but I do believe a scouting mission is in order. I freely offer to undertake said mission no matter what dangers are involved.

I maybe some time.......

[bytepilot.livejournal.com]

Argh! she did it again...

[velvet-the-cat.livejournal.com]

"P.S. Yes, I'm still hungry."

I'd never have guessed! ;o)

Hungry

[smokingboot.livejournal.com]

Did you ever see the 80s film 'Tampopo'? It's the ultimate foodie film, and it's very funny. One part of the story features a white-suit clad Yakuza who gets shot, and gives a long speech about wild boars in a certain wood eating yam throughout the winter...when the intestines get pulled out, he tells us, they are like 'yam-flavoured sausages.' He then laughs himself to death.

it was after I had spent 10 minutes trying to google this piece of dialogue that I realised I was completely obsessed.

Re: Hungry

[velvet-the-cat.livejournal.com]

The initiation of Plan C at the same time as a diet was never a good combination. I tend to try to handle it by trying to find delectable 'healthy' food. The obsession is no less, but the end result might not be so bad...