'Blaaar!' Cried Cromwell the War Toad

So here I am trying to write a horror love story, and I really do have the most beautiful idea, gorgeous and delicate. Can I write it?

My writing displeases me. It's awkward. I am trying so hard, too hard, and conversely, I have lost my discipline. I don't know how to just flow into the writing, or how to sustain the effort. No idea what's wrong with me!

This is not made easier by the news that two of my colleagues have just made a short film now shortlisted for some prestigious attention. I'm not surprised as they are both immensely talented, but I am frustrated; don't get me wrong, they worked long and hard and deserve what they're getting. I just wish I could create the pictures in my head with as much clarity and energy as they do. I envy their strength and application. It's not my imagination, I'm not doing myself down, this is not modesty or self-deprecation. I really am writing badly. Blaaar!