Cheese, zombies, fire, cats, Leon
Mar. 30th, 2005 11:39 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
smokingbootThe game didn't happen last night because cyanidemigraine was dead on his feet. But Leon sans lj came round anyway, armed with wine and cheeses, and we ate and drank and talked. Then, because larians is a fanatic, we played with his birthday present from Bruce, a board game called 'Zombies'. And then something happened.
But to understand it, we must first go back to earlier in the day, when I was fighting the smell of adventuring stranger-cat (yes, it has turned up again) in the kitchen and conservatory. Instead of taking the shrewd advice ofmitchy on this subject, I used a lethal cocktail of bleach, flowery disinfectant, tea-tree oil and ground black pepper. It worked. Now the evil beastie had sprayed against a couple of my fig plants, so I had sprayed them with tea-tree oil. All well and good; until I decided to go the extra mile and, forgetting my earlier efforts, stuffed lit incense cones into the earth around them. The word 'oil' should have been a clue, but there you go.
larians cooked Beef Wellington as a starter. We ate and enjoyed, all the time somewhat surprised at the strong smell of smoke; clearly the oven needed cleaning badly. It didn't get in the way, and we retired to comfy seats and zombies. Then I went to check that all the candles were out; the others joined me to find the conservatory full of acrid smoke. Could it be the candles? They were out. The oven? It was off. The peat under the fig plants burning merrily away in their pots? Could be...
Hot enough to have melted a nearby plastic bag, one flowerpot was glowing with a kind of determined incendiary menace. Imagine my distress when my old ficus benjaminus (Benny the Fig) slumped to one side, roots chewed through by the ever advancing hot ashes. Man, I am not good with plants, but I never burned them to death before. More important at the time (forgive me Gaia) was the potential for having burned us all to death in our beds.
We got all the offending plants outside, wherelarians hosed them down. Benny the Fig is dead. The others are still out there in the rain, drenched and miserable, thanks to Boot, the Avatar of Stupidity. To make matters worse, the kittens got out experiencing the night for the first time. They did not want to come back and it took me time and guile to manipulate them back into the house. I caught the demon lord, and left him inside protesting bitterly, while our little huntress scampered with delight up and down the lane at the back, into the park and the gardens of strangers, and even, somewhat ominously, round the curve towards where the great metal beasts roar and roam.
They are grown cats now. I fear to let them out in the dark, because I dread looking for them along the kerb sides and finding car-mangled messes, but their joy was total and undeniable. This is what they are made for, this is what they truly are. If I want them to be as happy as they can be, they need freedom at night.
And Leon? First time he stays over, a kitten dies. Second time, he's locked in the upstairs loo by an over-zealous handle, rescued only bycyanidemigraine's inherent criminality and a spoon. Third time, the house nearly burns down. He must think we're a little odd.
There is no smell of cat this morning. We, the house and everything in it, smell of char-grill.
cyanidemigraine was dead on his feet. But Leon sans lj came round anyway, armed with wine and cheeses, and we ate and drank and talked. Then, because larians is a fanatic, we played with his birthday present from Bruce, a board game called 'Zombies'. And then something happened. But to understand it, we must first go back to earlier in the day, when I was fighting the smell of adventuring stranger-cat (yes, it has turned up again) in the kitchen and conservatory. Instead of taking the shrewd advice of
mitchy on this subject, I used a lethal cocktail of bleach, flowery disinfectant, tea-tree oil and ground black pepper. It worked. Now the evil beastie had sprayed against a couple of my fig plants, so I had sprayed them with tea-tree oil. All well and good; until I decided to go the extra mile and, forgetting my earlier efforts, stuffed lit incense cones into the earth around them. The word 'oil' should have been a clue, but there you go.larians cooked Beef Wellington as a starter. We ate and enjoyed, all the time somewhat surprised at the strong smell of smoke; clearly the oven needed cleaning badly. It didn't get in the way, and we retired to comfy seats and zombies. Then I went to check that all the candles were out; the others joined me to find the conservatory full of acrid smoke. Could it be the candles? They were out. The oven? It was off. The peat under the fig plants burning merrily away in their pots? Could be...Hot enough to have melted a nearby plastic bag, one flowerpot was glowing with a kind of determined incendiary menace. Imagine my distress when my old ficus benjaminus (Benny the Fig) slumped to one side, roots chewed through by the ever advancing hot ashes. Man, I am not good with plants, but I never burned them to death before. More important at the time (forgive me Gaia) was the potential for having burned us all to death in our beds.
We got all the offending plants outside, where
larians hosed them down. Benny the Fig is dead. The others are still out there in the rain, drenched and miserable, thanks to Boot, the Avatar of Stupidity. To make matters worse, the kittens got out experiencing the night for the first time. They did not want to come back and it took me time and guile to manipulate them back into the house. I caught the demon lord, and left him inside protesting bitterly, while our little huntress scampered with delight up and down the lane at the back, into the park and the gardens of strangers, and even, somewhat ominously, round the curve towards where the great metal beasts roar and roam. They are grown cats now. I fear to let them out in the dark, because I dread looking for them along the kerb sides and finding car-mangled messes, but their joy was total and undeniable. This is what they are made for, this is what they truly are. If I want them to be as happy as they can be, they need freedom at night.
And Leon? First time he stays over, a kitten dies. Second time, he's locked in the upstairs loo by an over-zealous handle, rescued only by
cyanidemigraine's inherent criminality and a spoon. Third time, the house nearly burns down. He must think we're a little odd.There is no smell of cat this morning. We, the house and everything in it, smell of char-grill.
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no subject
Date: 2005-03-30 11:40 am (UTC)As for intruding cats - we're having increasing trouble with Eponine's boyfriend. On Monday we were sitting watching the telly when I noticed eponine was distracted by the plant on the table by the computer wobbling. The window wasn't open, so I thought it a little strange and kept an eye on it. A few minutes later a big black and white paw appeared over the side of the side table. Hasty movement of the sofa meant that he was rumbled - he must have been there for hours! So we kicked him out. When I came in from work yesterday the arrogant sod was curled up on the chair in the bedroom and instead of pegging it out of the cat flap immediately, looked at me like he owned the place. I couldn't even throw water on him because he was lying on the clothes I wanted to wear! Rest assured that I found another way to make him run away.
no subject
Date: 2005-03-30 12:14 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2005-03-30 02:13 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2005-03-30 12:30 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2005-03-30 02:09 pm (UTC)Due enquiries around the neighbours reveal that no-one knows who he belongs to, but he is a terroriser of local cats (surprise; he was nice to our kitties)and his destiny, should his most vocal enemy at number 35 get their way, will be a neck-wringing!:-(
no subject
Date: 2005-03-30 02:15 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2005-03-30 02:25 pm (UTC)One excellent way to punish a cat - you know the spray bottles for misting plants? Set it to open so it ejects a solid stream of water and shoot it at the cat. It wont do any lasting damage (except to his pride), but it is one thing that they seem to remember.
no subject
Date: 2005-03-30 04:13 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2005-03-30 05:22 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2005-04-18 09:52 am (UTC)But yes, you do have to be a little careful and not spray them full in the face.
Mostly cats will flee if caught doing something bad so they end up with a wet tail rather than a wet head.
spraying interloping cats
Date: 2005-03-30 03:35 pm (UTC)for that matter what man in his right mind would risk that?
Re: spraying interloping cats
Date: 2005-03-30 03:53 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2005-03-30 04:07 pm (UTC)and
only the woman who torches spoons in my house could kill plant life with fire. I believe the cave man evolved beyond that stage.
ah well we all love you. Heh are you not coming over here tonight? err I will clear up all wooden and living objects. and put on my asbestos underwear
no subject
Date: 2005-03-30 04:49 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2005-03-30 04:49 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2005-03-30 09:19 pm (UTC)Zombies = OK, fine for a one-off. Munchkin is better.
Best of Luck tomorrow:-)
no subject
Date: 2005-03-30 07:31 pm (UTC)Remember - onion or vanilla essence :)
onion or vanilla it is
Date: 2005-03-30 09:15 pm (UTC)