Agents and editors

[smokingboot]

It's always been easy in the past.

Editor: Hello Ms Strokingchute, you have been recommended to me by one of the dipsomaniacs in my employ. Show me what you can do.

Buddingauthorboot takes out wax crayon and draws moustache on editor's face.

Editor: That's a bit intellectual, Ms Pokingbeaut. Can we make it more accessible*? Remember, we want everyone to enjoy it.

Buddingauthorboot draws moustache on own face. Misses left side.

Editor: OK, you're hired. Take a handful of peanuts on your way out.

Buddingauthorboot: Thank you. To peanuts: I shall take you home and call you 'pay.'



Well, now it's different. It's different because I care, it's different because I may need an agent, and my god they all want different things; a full page synopsis, a half page synopsis, three consecutive chapters, two consecutive chapters, 50 pages, 55 pages, a writing CV, a paragraph detailing your writing credits, your novel written on a grain of rice in gold leaf blessed by the buddha...the letters all need to be personalised. Plus, they all want to be first. Now this is really hard; In my pathetic attempts to have a life, I was going to do the whole mailshot thing, you know, send it out to 20 or so at a time. Oh my word, no, bad juju, that just won't do. Let them know if you are showing your prize to other agents. Why? So they can mug them in carparks and run off with your manuscript?

I must look at US agents too, but I don't know enough about copyright laws in the States to feel secure. If anyone's got good current info on that, I would be grateful.

And the thing really needs a lot of editing. The temptation is to spend the day dragging it out on here, chapter by chapter, and editing it on lj. Why? Because my fear of the audience means I edit well when I know someone may read it any minute now. It's good for me, but I find it hard to do. Lots of lj cuts needed, and maybe only my friends list able to access it. That feels weird. It's kind of inimical to my idea of creativity to bar anyone from reading what I write.

OK, too little sleep is making me fret. Time for coffee.


*By which we do not mean, 'Dumb it down to the level of a Bush speech'. Of course we don't.

Comments

[bad-moon-rising.livejournal.com]

I you want myself or even sight unseen some colleagues of mine that advise regarding CV writing let me know.

[smokingboot.livejournal.com]

Thank you, I may very well come bleating to you for help in creating a CV that will sell in the real world market place - ironically, writing creds are the only part of my CV not requiring a fiction boost!

Allow me...

[bytepilot.livejournal.com]

To point you in the direction of the very beautiful and wonderful thalanoviel who,
as the daughter of Thog the Mighty himself, knows a good US based editor* who in turn Knows These Things.
Somewhat indirect but it may start rolling whatever ball needs rolling.

*It's her dad, who is John Grant

Re: Allow me...

[smokingboot.livejournal.com]

Thank you my dear, that is very kind. I will indeed ask your lovely lady for help.

Re: Allow me...

[smokingboot.livejournal.com]

Hang on a mo! Hadn't thought, all things considered, is Jane up for being badgered right now?

[thalinoviel.livejournal.com]

I'm crap. Try me if you have no bites by 15 July when term ends. But he's no longer a commisioning editor and not really the person to go to.

[smokingboot.livejournal.com]

Thank you, you are lovely, but no need to trouble yourself at all. Here's to things looking up for you. Like I said before, anything I can do, just let me know.