Frustrated and obtuse
Aug. 29th, 2004 03:11 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
My mood has plummeted somewhat, despite a lovely and restful weeekend. My love came back from Switzerland on Friday evening, absolutely exhausted, and we took the opportunity to do nothing except enjoy each other's company. Friday night was magical for me. I heard an owl hooting jubilantly across the neighbourhood, so close I swear I thought he was on the windowsill. The happy hooter was not exactly being subtle; every crow, bat and mouse in the area must have heard him. I heard a crow calling from the east at 6 the same morning. My sleep pattern is shot to bits.
Yesterday I added another dish to my repertoire of things I can cook without killing people. I am up to a grand total of three: chili con carne, pan-fried chicken with artichoke hearts, and now mussels in white wine and cream. Even if I say so myself, the latter was rather successful.
But I am not myself. My mind feels thick and blunt and tired. Right now I feel that something important, something sharp and enervating, is eluding me.
I am also dreading the project we need to get going next week. A publishing package I don't think I know, scanner work (which I have never done before)...lots and lots of text...this feels complicated. I know it isn't, that this is meant to be a thing of pleasure, that it is up to me not to let it turn into grinding effort, but I am being bugged by my own need for it to be excellent and my frustration lies in feeling that we have cut the timing too fine.
Phooey.
Yesterday I added another dish to my repertoire of things I can cook without killing people. I am up to a grand total of three: chili con carne, pan-fried chicken with artichoke hearts, and now mussels in white wine and cream. Even if I say so myself, the latter was rather successful.
But I am not myself. My mind feels thick and blunt and tired. Right now I feel that something important, something sharp and enervating, is eluding me.
I am also dreading the project we need to get going next week. A publishing package I don't think I know, scanner work (which I have never done before)...lots and lots of text...this feels complicated. I know it isn't, that this is meant to be a thing of pleasure, that it is up to me not to let it turn into grinding effort, but I am being bugged by my own need for it to be excellent and my frustration lies in feeling that we have cut the timing too fine.
Phooey.
no subject
Date: 2004-08-30 03:48 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2004-08-30 02:10 pm (UTC)