Things that annoy me

I still find it hard to just talk about PTSD. There was an event I might have gone to; the PTSD caused part of my misgiving but not all of it. I explained how I felt on the appropriate FB page and then had to delete it. Every deletion is an act of admitting how much it still depresses me, how discussion is still hard.

I'm still angry at the impact of the problem. Not hugely, but enough for me to feel raw when saying much about it. Nine times out of ten, my solution to everything is to write it out, because in the craft of writing is divorce from feeling. You may write it first and be in it, but the time comes when the writer withdraws from being in and must become observer, or there's no hope of lucid editing. The terror becomes a story, eventually, after repetition, a cliche, a rote, then an echo, then a nothing. Write it so often one rolls one's eyes at it. Make it stale, over and over again.

So annoying to find that so hard. Impossible, even now.

I still haven't filled in that bloody form. In fact, I don't know where it is. I should do that today, it's late.

I don't know where it is, don't want to do it, don't want to think about it. Pah.

Something else,something else. I have just defriended a perfectly nice man because he put some crappy Freedom for Tommy meme on his feed.I don't get this business at all. Tommy Robinson is not about freedom. He's a narcissistic thug+wifebeater+drunk+racist. No, it's not about freedom of speech. The guy broke the law about filming defendants going into a live trial. The reason it's against the law in cases like this,is because it can impact the possibility of that trial being fair and objective. He was told this, did it anyway, was found guilty of Contempt of Court. So no, I am not interested in Freedom for Stephen Yaxley-Lennon, aka Tommy Robinson aka Andrew McMaster aka Paul Harris aka any other monicker he can tack onto himself in his attempts to sound 'street.'

And I'm sorry, perfectly nice man, or maybe I'm not. Maybe I'm just being polite. If you believe this stuff, you're either perfectly misinformed, perfectly silly or not so perfectly nice. I am imperfectly impatient, and I'm not having this crap greet me first thing in the morning. Bye.