Oh no.

Something has come up and despite the need to respond, I can't do it.

Can't. Stupid word, how can this be happening? This same time last year I had just finished a massive piece of work with a great team. Then I went to Vietnam and Cambodia, ran part of the Cu Chi tunnels, climbed Ta Keo, kept going going going, and that was while the cancer was still working its evil in my bod. How could I be stronger then than now? Three ops and radiotherapy later, no cancer, just a bit of a rash and here we are at Can't. This is insane! It's all done now, so how can I be like this?

You'd think sheer relief would carry me per ardua ad astra. Yes, they talk about recovery etc, tell me to expect fatigue. And I do. But it's a kind of academic expectation, envisaged as a bit of inconvenience, not some invisible intangible nothing that flattens me completely. After all, if I can write this, why can't I write the necessary stuff? Why can't I focus?

Stupid, annoying, frustrating. But here I am.