Smokingboot

If someone you care about goes through some sort of trauma do not:

a) Hug them. It may just seem humane to you, but they may not like or want the contact you are offering. Ask first.

b)Keep hugging them even when they begin to show distress.

c)Prevent them from getting out of your embrace, or in any way pressurise them into staying in your arms 'because you wuv them.' Oh no you don't and they know it.

d) Draw them very close to your mouth and lock them in your arms so that bar fighting or screaming, they cannot get you off.

e) Tell them how much you adore them and how you don't want to see them as a 'sad rag.' As if they were doing something wrong in being first shocked by their trauma and now shocked by your horrible creepy behaviour.

If you have attempted anything in the list beyond A, face the fact that you need to sort yourself out, and go do it. Now, before you f*ck anything else up.

PS. This is not just a pop at one individual; it's a warning to anybody tempted to use friendship in adversity as a means of attempting romantic closeness. Wrong place for agendas!