Manners and signals

[smokingboot]

It has been a long time since I have been with a lot of people unknown to me, the last time I did it was to support a couple of friends in putting something together. And it was OK, I was as I always have been. If I'm wearing a mask I am unaware of it at the time; the vibe fits and I fit the vibe, and it's fun. Some people want to be friendly, some want to come closer. One of these latter seems like a delicate, sensible, intelligent man, and would like us to meet up to discuss things.

He's a nice guy but this is a direct come on, and I feel very awkward. It's not like I think this about every friend who asks me out, but even with friends like Steve I would make sure to have another chum present, not because he would ever try anything, but because that's how I feel comfortable.

I think this man must have got the wrong impression, probably my fault, my signal. For the meeting I tried to be welcoming, but had no idea I had given off any further vibe. It wasn't my intention. We all spoke very pleasantly, he knows I am engaged, everybody talked about witchy things... there was no angle. I didn't mean to flirt with him in any way. And yet somehow this stuff turns up.

In any case I must deflect him. Don't want to offend this guy, didn't mean to lead him on and am not sure of how or even if I did. Got to take a little responsibility and answer his message honestly and gently.

I feel so over all this kind of thing. Why is it following me?

Comments

[november-girl.livejournal.com]

...because you're gorgeous? :)

You say lovely things

[smokingboot.livejournal.com]

That makes me feel great about myself, thank you! :-)

[jfs.livejournal.com]

Does it have to be a question of "probably my fault" m'dear?

It is a miscommunication - something that happens in the wires, not at either end. You'll be kind to him about his misunderstanding because that's the person you are. Be kind to yourself too.

Excellent advice...

[smokingboot.livejournal.com]

which, inadvertantly, I have followed.

My message back to him was such that neither of us need be uneasy, and I feel a lot more relaxed about it on his account and mine. It's good to be reminded about the need for all-round kindness. Thank you my dear x

Re: Excellent advice...

[smokingboot.livejournal.com]

Inadvertently. Blimey, I must be sleepy.